Thursday, October 28, 2010

The Wedding

Planning a wedding is like building ikea furniture, but you don't get instructions or even a picture of what the furniture should look like.

But by some miracle, you figure it out, and its the best furniture you've ever built. You enjoy the crap out of it for a day and it was worth all the trouble. 

Now that I'm married, I am really looking forward to letting myself go. If I work hard at it, I think by next summer I could have 85% more belly, 75% less hair, a sparse and wild beard, and my Snuggie will fit like a sweater.

I have already started carrying a utility belt of hostess sno-ball cupcakes. 

21 comments:

Heather Dixon said...

now i want to get married so i can have a snow-ball belt

John T. Quinn 3rd said...

don't laugh. it happens to most of us.

Megan Nicole Dong said...

Hahaha! Congrats on getting married! And man, that snowball utility-belt idea + Snuggie sweater idea is freaking brilliant. If you're going to let yourself go, why not do it in style, right?

Munchanka said...

Congrats! But good luck retaining the snoballs weight once you have to start chasing kids around.

tek! said...

haha 'smells so swedish' excellent jokes again

Carrie Liao said...

Congratulations!! :D


(by the way, what does swedish smell like, exactly? I'm going to let my American show and say 'meatballs')

Kumar said...

No no no you are doing this all wrong! First you have to get her pregnant to lock her in. That way when you get fat and disgusting she'll be forced to stay with you because of the kids. Trust me Ive done this a million times

Erik Benson said...

Carrie- I am a quarter swedish so I can tell you that yes, a quarter of me does smell like meatballs and lingonberry jam. Its wonderful.

Kumar- You clearly know what you are doing. I will cut down to only have 4 to 5 sno-balls a day, so I can maintain my ripened apple like figure.

Opto-Mom said...

After 16 years of marriage, I have decided to get back in shape. Round is a shape, right?

St├ęphane Kardos said...

My wife is 100% Swedish, and she doesn't smell meatballs. How dare you! :)

nate v said...

Nailed it! Congrats. total life win.

himparkh said...
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abhi said...
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Elizabeth McMahill said...

http://s7.kmart.com/is/image/Sears/070W023904240001?hei=600&wid=600&op_sharpen=1
you know, for when you want to dress up.

Solomon said...

Live the dream man...live the dream.

PaulTinker said...

Congrats mate! - saw your work at the 25 Years Of Pixar Exhibit in Oakland!

Stevie Ray said...

omg hilarious!! :D

joe said...
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chelsea said...

Congratulations Erik !

Colin Jack said...

awesome drawings , Great blog!

Brandon said...

thanks for the good laughs as usual! congrats on the marriage, my friend.