Friday, April 08, 2011

Twilight Romance

Last weekend my wife and I were leaving Trader Joes with our groceries. We were right behind a grandma and her grandson. She was in her twilight years and he looked like he played a hunky werewolf in the best twilight film(new moon). The sun was setting and we had white cheddar corn puffs to eat when we got home, it was looking like that sunday was going to be my favorite sunday ever.

And then the unthinkable...

The hunky werewolf grabbed the grandma who was not his grandma(I think) and kissed her with a passionate open mouthed kiss. 
Obviously I was stunned.
 Lindsay played it cool...
Lindsay-"Just keep walking, don't look."
Lindsay-"Just keep walking, don't look."

 Lindsay-"Just keep walking, don't look."

I was frozen.
 

After quite some time they stopped kissing and I regained the use of my legs. When I  made it to the car, I looked up and saw...
He was helping her put on her seatbelt and went in for more old face sucking.

I tried to start the car...
But I couldn't. It was like I was looking at the eye of Sauron.



I was finally able to figure it out. We sped off home, but the damage was done. I didn't even feel like eating the white cheddar corn puffs anymore, my sunday was ruined.

I know what you're thinking. Was it really such a passionate looking kiss? The answer is, YES! It was a VERY passionate kiss.

I know what else you're thinking. How did you get so good at drawing cars? Answer, I worked on Cars 2 for like a year, so yeah, that's how.

33 comments:

Carrie Liao said...

well, damn. You did answer all my questions.

And man, grandmas who are not grandmas really know how to grip their men. It must be that beautiful knowledge that comes with age...

Fawn said...

Carrie giggled so hard while she was reading this, which lead me to read this too.

Cougars are pretty amazing.

Jushtin E. Lee said...

jeezus, you're one funny dude.

MutantKitten said...

Best story ever! :)

Logan Pearsall said...

so funny!

tek! said...

haha hilarious story!

Joseph Mingoo Lee said...

hilarious! did it happen in slow motion too? X)

Ted Blackman said...

Excuse me while I dry-heave.
Very funny.

Adam Campbell said...

haha! This is just what I've been waiting for! What a great story! Thanks for sharing

Brad said...

HAHAHA! hilarious, and yes i was wondering how you got so good at drawing cars

Skim said...

gaaahaha so great!

John T. Quinn 3rd said...

Brilliant as always.

Claire said...

My favorite part was "It was like looking into the eye of Sauron". Hilarious.

Adam said...

The sheer horror!!

How you ever survived this incident I will never know.

Thank you for being so brave.

sussman said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA disturbing but hilarious

Kendra Phillips said...

HAHAHA incredible. And disturbing. Incredibly disturbing, I daresay

Crossing the line from "cougar" to "dragon" right there.

tiffannysketchbook said...

your blog is so freakin' funny!!!!!!!!!!! So you worked on Cars 2 eh?! awesome.

Caroline Damen said...

haha very nice story! :)

Octavio E. Rodriguez said...

Lol, very funny.

Aaron Ludwig said...

I wasn't gonna read this post until I saw the awesome cars.
Thanks for making all of us laugh.

Daniel Gonzales said...

good one man, keep them coming

Ethan Hegge said...

That poor grandma was probably being taken advantage of and you just watched as it happen...well done E, and yes those cars in the back ground sure do look nice. I hope you were actually able to eat those white cheddar corn puffs, if not please mail to cal arts.

DEANNA MARSIGLIESE said...

BAHAHAHAHAHAAAA-HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! That's all I have to say about that.

Quentin Lebegue said...

This was so funny !!
I love the way you re-use some shots for comic effect. It's awesome.
And yeah, "It was like I was looking into the eye of Sauron", hahaha.

Man, you made my day.

Betsy Bauer said...

I think you're my favorite. And I mean that in the least-possible-internet-creepy-way.

Daron Leah Nefcy said...

She must have been a Saber, you know, the grandma version of a cougar.

Seriously though. I saw this same thing once at the beach, old wrinkly lady and a handsome European looking guy. Absolutely terrifying.

SteveLambe said...

Your posts always make laugh out loud. Best blog ever!

ginger said...

HAHAH :) I just stumbled upon your blog. Love it ! Made me laugh really hard.

Nic Sweet said...

We should all be so lucky that we have someone to suck passionate face with.

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Eric Henze said...

Just discoverd your blog. Laugh out loud funny! Nice work!

Nikhita said...

Dayym dude. :-s
That's some uneasy stuff to digest. :-s

Emily said...

okay okay, I've gone back and looked through to be sure I know my favorite and I distinctly remember going nuts over this one so.. FAVE!! :D honorable mentions: #1 on the #5, German eye poker (I know that one seems random but picturing it especially know made me laugh a bunch), and most def Woman vs Market.

ps. you should do some silly updates soon when you are not too busy :)

pss. this is not your mom

pss. it's weird adam commented on this, riight!?!